Most of us would prefer our children to be popular.

Here is our essential list of ten key manners to ensure your child is asked back to playdates. Let’s be honest – none of us particularly likes a child with bad manners unless they are our own – we would always prefer to have the polite and cheery child to tea rather than the rude, shouty one. Well Miss Manners would anyway.

Basic good manners should be automatic but consistency is key. Demand them at home and then they will happen anyway.

Miss Manners Tip:

Your behaviour counts as well and remember to be positive and reinforce good behaviour with praise.

(Basically this means always bad mouth people out of earshot of your children)



Number one.
Say please and thank you when asking for something or being offered something (now that’s not too difficult is it?)


Number Two
Use cutlery to eat and do not eat with hands or like a dog. ( you would be surprised)

Number Three
Don’t complain about what is served for tea. If you don’t like it then say ‘I’m so sorry but this is not my favourite – is it okay if I eat as much as I can?’ If a child says this then Miss Manners would gladly make them something else to eat – if they say ‘I don’t like X and push their plate away then they can starve.

Number Four
Do not comment on people’s physical attributes or houses unless it is complimentary. “ Your mum is rally ugly/fat/mean” never won us over.


Number Five
Ask to leave the table ‘ Thank you for me lovely tea – please can I leave the table’ always works for me. Saying yuk and running around the kitchen with a dishcloth on your head, doesn’t.

Number Six
At the end of the playdate – thank the adult and child ‘Thank you for having me.” Bonus points and a guaranteed return – “I had a really good time”


Number Seven
Say excuse me if you want to speak whilst an adults are talking and then wait to be invited to speak. If in doubt they heard – say excuse me again or put your finger up to be noticed.

Number Eight
Answer when spoken to by a parent -ideally looking at the person talking otherwise we think you are stupid and don’t want our child to hang out with you.

Number Nine

Ask permission to do something first whether its to turn on the TV, play with a toy or go into a different room. Bonus Point

Finally and Most Essentially

Number Ten 
Do not ask us to wipe your bum. Ever.

If you’re old enough to attend a playdate on your own – you are old enough to use the loo on your own. Full Stop.

Please note: Miss Manners is a guest columnist and as such we take no responsibility for our children not adhering to the above rules in a satisfactory way. (ahem!)